Feel like punching a wall, shouting expletives to whoever is within shouting distance or drinking yourself into oblivion? Men, I’m talking to you. Some women suffer terribly during menopause. But men can have a tough go of it for different reasons.
There you are; the woman you love has turned into a wild creature, careening through mood swings like a roller-coaster and you can’t do anything to stop it. What’s worse than feeling helpless and powerless? You’re men, so, probably not too many other things. If you think about those times when you had no control over your life, how did you feel? Rage, right? Well, your wife wants to scream at the world to make it stop and it just won’t.
Being men, where do you turn? To your buddies? That’s good for an extra pint or a chin-up old man or a weak joke but you still have to go home and face the missus.
So what can you do? Here are 5 tips to help you cope. By the way, writing these is easy, doing them is not, so cut yourself a lot of slack if you screw up. Just get back up on that horse and try again. You’ll get points for trying.
Tip #1: Stop feeling sorry for yourself
Wallowing in self-pity is for losers. Life isn’t fair so get over it. After all, she put up with you all those years.
Tip#2: Man Up
Throughout your relationship, you are the person your wife depended on for strength and consistency, her rock. Don’t give up now. This is your job so get to it.
Tip#3: Shut the f*#ck up
Do not, and I mean do not engage in a verbal battle. It will only prolong the nasty, violent outburst. Don’t offer suggestions or platitudes either. Those are fighting words.
Tip#4: Tell her you love her
Tell her you adore her, you love her and that she is your world and mean it. Do this when you get up in the morning, when you return from work and when you are going to bed.
Tip#5: Walk away
If the meltdown and personal assaults are making you angry, walk away, leave the house. But not before you look her in the eyes and say, I love you and I’m here for you but I need an hour to be that man you need.
The really good news is that your wife will want you more than ever. It’s not going to be easy and each day brings the unknown but that also means there will be days and moments of supreme bliss.
If talking to a neutral, third party helps, then by all means contact Christine Caldwell Coaching. I am here to help. Contact me at firstname.lastname@example.org for a free consultation. I would also love your thoughts and comments at Partner Support for Menopausal Wives, https://www.facebook.com/groups/292877614958533/.
Christine Caldwell Coaching
Christine Caldwell is a certified Neuro-Linguistic Programming coach, and has completed both the Robbins-Madanes Core 100 and Core 200 coaching programs. Additionally, Christine has 30 years’ experience as a sales and marketing executive, business owner and career counselor. For more information go to: www.christinecaldwellcoaching.com.